“I just don’t know what they want from me.”
That was the sentence a frustrated junior analyst blurted out during a coaching session. She was competent, eager, and hardworking—but felt stuck. Her manager kept changing priorities. Deadlines shifted with no explanation. Recognition was sparse, feedback even rarer.
If you’ve ever felt the same, here’s the truth: mastering your craft isn’t enough. To truly grow, build influence, and thrive in your career, you need to learn the art of managing up.
And no, it’s not manipulation. It’s not flattery. It’s strategic relationship-building. It’s how high performers ensure their work is seen, their time is respected, and their potential is realized.
Let’s unpack how to work better with your boss.
What is Managing Up and Why it Matters
Managing up is the proactive practice of building a strong, collaborative relationship with your manager by understanding their goals, communication style, and pressures—then aligning your work to support them effectively.
Think of it like this: your boss is your most important stakeholder. They influence your visibility, advancement, and growth. But they’re also human. They juggle competing priorities, KPIs, cross-functional politics, and sometimes just… bad days.
If you can make their job easier while also making your contributions clearer, you’ll stand out, not by shouting louder, but by working smarter.
According to a 2023 Gallup report, managers account for 70% of the variance in employee engagement. But employees who learn how to manage that dynamic experience higher satisfaction, faster progression, and greater career control.
Step 1: Study Your Boss Like a Project Brief
Start by decoding your manager. Observe without judgment. Ask:
- What seems to stress them out?
- What does “good work” look like in their eyes?
- How do they prefer to receive updates—Slack? Email? A quick chat?
- Do they value initiative or prefer tight alignment?
- Are they a big-picture thinker or detail-oriented?
Once you understand their style, you can tailor your approach. For example, if they skim long emails, use bullet points and bolded keywords. If they make decisions in the moment, don’t wait for a formal check-in; bring ideas when the door opens.
Pro Tip: Keep a one-page “Manager Operating Manual” for yourself. Update it over time with what works.
Step 2: Anticipate Needs Without Overstepping
Managing up is about alignment, not assumption. You don’t need to become psychic. But you can build a rhythm of anticipating their needs.
Let’s say you’re preparing a deck for a big presentation. Rather than asking, “Do you want me to make slides?” ask:
“I know you’re prepping for the Q3 stakeholder meeting. Would it help if I pulled key metrics into a visual summary and drafted 2–3 slides for you to review?”
You’ve just made their life easier. That’s managing up in action.
But boundaries matter. If you find yourself taking on too much or being treated like a personal assistant, it’s time to recalibrate. Managing up is a two-way street, not an invitation to be overworked.
Step 3: Communicate with Clarity and Context
Great managers want to empower their team. But they can’t read your mind.
One of the best ways to manage up is to proactively communicate. This includes:
- Weekly status updates: A short email summarizing what’s done, what’s next, and any blockers.
- Clear asks: Don’t just drop a problem on their desk—flag it with options or suggested next steps.
- Contextual insight: “Here’s why this matters to our bigger goal” shows strategic thinking.
And when something goes wrong (because it will)? Own it early. Offer a solution. No spin, no hiding. That builds trust, and trust is your career currency.
Managing up is about alignment, not assumption. You don’t need to become psychic, but you do need alignment.
Step 4: Build the Relationship Beyond Tasks
You don’t need to be best friends. But you do need mutual respect.
Find small moments to connect. Ask about their career path. Offer gratitude when they support you. Reflect back when they give feedback: “That was helpful. Can you share more on what you’d like to see next time?”
This creates psychological safety—a foundation for growth conversations, new opportunities, and yes, promotions.
If your manager seems distant, don’t take it personally. Some leaders aren’t naturally people oriented. That’s okay. You can still lead from where you are by showing up consistently, communicating clearly, and making the partnership feel productive.
Step 5: Reframe Power as Partnership
Here’s a mindset shift that changes everything: Your boss isn’t just your evaluator—they’re your partner in impact.
When you manage up well, you move from task-taker to thought partner. You shift from “waiting to be told” to “proactively creating value.” That’s how early- and mid-career professionals become indispensable.
And if you’re thinking, “But my manager is toxic or ineffective”—that’s real, too. In those cases, managing up might mean setting boundaries, documenting everything, and activating lateral allies or mentors. Your psychological safety comes first.
But in many cases, the gap isn’t dysfunction, it’s misalignment. And misalignment is fixable.
You Have More Agency Than You Think
No one teaches you this in school. But managing up is one of the most underrated career accelerators out there.
When done well, it:
- Increases trust and autonomy.
- Improves visibility with senior leaders.
- Builds resilience, influence, and leadership credibility.
- Turns frustrating dynamics into collaborative ones.
So, if you’ve ever felt overlooked or misunderstood at work, try looking up. Not to blame but to build. To connect. To lead.
What one shift can you make this week to strengthen your relationship with your manager? Start there. Your future self will thank you.
